Wherever you go, there you are…

When I was a kid, I had this dream that someday I would move away, go somewhere warm (at the time the goal was California), and then somehow everything would be better. I ended up going to college in Arizona for a bit, but didn’t stay long, spent a few years in Texas, and ended up back in Illinois, right where I had started. Into my adult life, I always wanted to move back to Arizona, as I felt I had left too soon. About almost 2 years ago now, I applied and interviewed for a job there and was again hopeful, that somehow moving back to Arizona would right the wrongs in my life and then I would find happiness. I didn’t get the job and I see now that I wasn’t supposed to.

“What are you running from?”My friends would ask me. I spent a lot of time asking that of myself as well. I was happy overall…good job, good husband, good kids. What was I running from?! Honestly, I think it was me. My energy was anxious and always waiting for the next thing. I remembered that growing up, my dad always talked about moving, and how everything would be better if we moved away. It’s something I never thought much of, though I realize now what an impact that had on me.

Since this epiphany, I have tried to really root myself in my little town on the river, just a few miles from the town I grew up in, down the very same river. Might I move someday? I might. But my happiness is no longer dependent on “the next thing” or “the next place.” If my energy is positive and I can learn to live in the moment, then I can add value to others’ lives and in turn, finally be happy with myself.

One thought on “Wherever you go, there you are…

  1. I’m so glad you are here. The Lord has His hand on your life. You are making a difference in the life’s of many but most of all yourself. You are wise, kind, smart, happy but most of all loving and lovable. ❤️

    Like

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