This is a topic that can be challenging to explain sometimes, though such powerful information. I have maybe always known this, but most recently I was at a training in which a video was shown to me that I had seen many times before. But for some reason, this time it really sunk in. Watch it. Then finish reading this.
Whoa right?! If you’ve seen this before, I encourage you to step back and really think about this concept. At any one time we are exposed to 2 billion bits of information. We can generally attend to about 126 bits of information. Just like in the video, there is a TON of information that we are not attending to: that we HAVE NO IDEA we are missing. What we attend to, what we perceive is creating our reality. So when you notice the one person in the room not paying attention when you are telling a story and you say, “No one cares about what I have to say,” you are missing the others who were genuinely listening and interested.
To take this one further, we are often looking to confirm what we already believe so even if something is confirming a negative thought, we are predisposed to look for evidence to back up our beliefs. In psychology, this is called the Confirmation Bias. For example, there was a study done on a man who claimed to be very unlucky. The people doing this experiment were hoping to change his mindset around this and started implanting things into his life. So first the slipped a winning scratch off lottery ticket under his office door. Hidden cameras showed him throwing it away, unscratched! They planted a $100 bill on the sidewalk on a path he walked daily, he literally stepped right over it! They did a few more of these before ultimately showing him the video. Only then did he realize that there was so much information that he was not attending to.
How are you creating your reality? What are some of your core beliefs about yourself, the world, your life, etc? Are you only seeing the evidence for that which you believe to be true? Are you missing the evidence against your belief? Are you over-generalizing? Are there things that you believe about yourself that you find yourself telling others, “See, I told you I’m no good at _____” Next time you hear yourself say this, think this, etc., I encourage you to stop and look for the evidence of the other side. Or even to challenge the “always” and “never” in your vocabulary. Most things are not black or white. You might have a messy desk, but be good at making a schedule. Does this mean you are “organized” or “disorganized?” not really either, you just have strengths and weaknesses within a category.
The good news is this: If we are creating our reality, then we can re-create it any time we want! Think about what you really desire in your life. Write it down. Write it down as though it has already happened or is currently happening. Ex:) I am so grateful that I have a job I love and a family that supports me. Make it as long or as short as your desires. Then put this somewhere you will see it daily. Read it a few times a day, out loud if you can. Feel it in your body as though it is already true. Think about it throughout the day when you remember. Watch your reality shift.
As always, if you would like some one on one coaching around something related to this or moving through barriers that have kept you stuck, I’d love to talk more with you. Please see my contact page for information on setting up a FREE 60 minute Creating Confidence Strategy Call with me.
Love, Light, and Gratitude,